Fernandez & Wells

Never did your great grandparents, as they stoically endured years of rationing, envisage a day when human beings would voluntarily hand over £5.50 for a cheese and ham sandwich.

This cheese and ham sandwich though, as that gastronomic siren would sensuously purr, is not just any cheese and ham sandwich; it’s a Fernandez & Wells lomo and manchego bocadillo and the chances are that the pig inside that crusty baguette had a much better time of it than those relatives of yours back in the ‘40s.

Fernandez & Wells is the perfect haunt for a middle class foodie. The owners are into farmers’ markets and ‘slow food’, the insides of their premises are rustic in a sort of expensive, chic way, the coffees are works of art, and the staff are suitably snooty.

They use ingredients, like those in aforementioned sarni (sorry, bocadillo), that are rich and delicious; the meats are boudoir purple, the cheeses are old and nearly cantankerous and the accompanying aliolis, picadillis and garlic butters add an extra dimension of lavishness to lunchtime offerings.

There are cakes and biscuits dressing the wooden counter for afters, the pick of which is a plum cake so enjoyable the pope declared it immoral. A sugary crust dissolves in the mouth as moist, vanillary, almondy sponge gives up soggy, sweet fruit that retains enough of its texture to make the whole experience one which could render future puddings pointless.

In the evening the Lexington Street shop goes from café to candlelit bar, becoming a hellhole for vegans by serving plates of grilled meats, cheese and bottles of unusual, mostly French, Spanish, Italian or Portuguese, wine.

Though the service may be rather Sartrean and the sandwiches under-filled considering their exorbitant prices, the quality of the ingredients and the attitude and approach to food on offer make Fernandez & Wells a gourmet alternative to Pret-a-Manger et al, even if past generations are rolling in their graves as you hand over the handfuls of cash required to escape a shoplifting conviction.